Seriously – You Need to Get Over That Girl From High School

Every guy has had one.  The one girl pivotal in shaping what you are, and probably most importantly, what you're not.

You compare every new girl you meet to her, and if you like a girl, it's probably because some part of her, physically, emotionally, whatever, reminds you of who I'll contradictorily refer to as “The One.”

Maybe you met her in high school.  Maybe junior year of college.  Maybe she was the friend of a friend of a friend.  But ever since she broke your heart, somewhere in the back of your head, what you want in a girl is partly defined by her.

It's time to man up, grow up, and move on.

She's Not The One

The first and most crucial thing you need to understand is that you won't be able to maintain a healthy relationship with that new girl you're dating or eyeing until you get over The One.

This new girl is smart and funny, and had you met her before this girl that messed you up so badly, she probably would have been everything you ever wanted.  And she is still with you, which has major advantages over that girl you're still languishing over.

The hardest part is that you know all of this. You've known forever The One is no good for you, even if you could get her back.  In a subconscious situation like this rationality has nothing to do with it, and so, has everything to do with fixing it.

Love Vs Attached

The first step to moving on is realizing you don't love her.  You don't.  Maybe you never have.  You are attached to her, and this is very different, and you need to learn to distinguish the two. Love is something that doesn't come around very often, and most likely since you're not together anymore, the two of you weren't in love.  Love is kind, generous, and giving.  It is selfless and understanding.  Expressive and prioritized.   When have you witnessed a relationship that had these qualities AND was plagued by drama?

On the other hand it is easy to become attached to someone.  A relationship with a lot of fights or drama that is intermixed by some good times can create a very deep attachment for someone that can last a lifetime, long after going separate ways.  Jealousy, frustration, and unrequited attention are powerful feelings that can create an unjustified sense of depth or importance to a relationship; when in reality these should be signs of a deal breaker.

Any time you've heard someone talk about having “a lot of history” with someone all that means is there High School insetwas a lot of ups and downs in the relationship.  Often times this is used with a positive connotation, somehow implying that because essentially they had a horrible relationship with someone, that they would make up without breaking up, that they have a deep connection with each other.  Usually these relationships have been mired by cheating, physically or emotionally, or one person being more into it than the other.

One of the strongest emotions is that felt after recovering from an oncoming break up.  A rush of positivity, relief, and accomplishment skew the unfortunate reality into a feeling of potential.  It is no wonder that the lack of this “excitement” in your new relationships feels like a lack of passion. When really, it is a lack of turbulence.  This is a good thing. This is also why many people continue to get back together with someone after fighting or breaking up several times.  With the absence of love, the strongest emotion that exists within these types of relationships is this false rush of positivity.

A relationship like this can trigger strong emotions in someone, and it's easy to see how these can be confused for love or adoration.  However having “a lot of history” with a girl is never a justification for not breaking up with her or wanting to get back with her.  And this especially should never be used as a crutch for not being able to move on.

An attachment like this is hard to overcome, but understanding that it's based on negative emotions is important so that you can bounce back.

Ignore Her Calls

It should go without saying that if you're really ready to move past this hard time in your life you shouldn't still be talking to The One.  While people always try to do the “we're still friends” crap, you're not and you never will be.  She will always be your ex-girlfriend.  She will always be that girl that hurt you.  Even if years down the road you are able to chat or hang out occasionally she will never just be fulfilling the role of “friend.”

If you do still talk to her, it needs to stop immediately.  There's nothing like reliving the horrible relationship over and over every time you or her drunk dials each other, or every time she writes on your Wall.  Stop taking her calls.  Remove her from your friends on Facebook.  Take her off your chat lists. You have to fully remove her from your life.  Tell her you're going to do it if you want, just do it and stick to it.

So You Like Girls with Freckles…

If you find that you're mostly attracted to girls who share some physical trait with The One, the only way to overpower your subconscious is to just acknowledge it.  So you like brunettes with blonde highlights.  Tall redheads?  Casual girls who love to wear hoodies?  Whatever it is just go with it.  Who cares, so you're the guy who likes emo girls.  I promise you, the girl you finally end up with will probably be the last thing you were expecting in terms of what she looks like, but the only way to remove the blinders The One installed on you is to first acknowledge they're there.

She was important in your life and your development and there is no shame in the fact that you're still attracted to her physically.  Now move on.

Getting over a girl who was your first for anything or who really hurt you is a process that takes time, and there is no reason to jump back in full force until you're ready.  But if it's been a few years it may be time to take another look. There are a lot of special girls out there that actually deserve all this pining, you just have to let go and find them.

Andrew is the founder and editor of Primer. He's a graduate of American University and currently lives in Los Angeles. Read more about Primer on our About page. On Instagram: @andrewsnavely and @primermagazine.

  • Jason

    Wow. I related to this on way too many levels.

  • David Hutchison

    There is about five of my friends I need to send this to.

    • Harry G.


  • Albert

    my first…i guess you could call her “love”, in high school crushed me a couple of days after our three months by texting me “how do you feel about our relationship?” damn i cant believe how much that hurt me. i really never thought i was so attached to this girl. i dont find anyone attractive anymore. its been months now and im still hurting. i tried to never talk to her. except for when i asked her to give me back the hoodies i let her borrow. maybe im too young and just cant get over her…but i have been dumped before and i have gotten over other girls. so why am i so down about this one?

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  • R

    Thanks for the article. I’ve kind of realized this on a lot of levels about my “One”, but hearing it from another person always seems to give things more weight. I do believe I’ll bookmark this and readminister as needed.

  • jeremy

    man thanks alot this was helpfull the one really had me up especially we tried staying friends and she had a boyfriend and she cheated on him with me lol but the best is to stop cut her off

    • G

      Oh so YOU have the crabs that she was supposed to be babysitting for me?> <LOL) .

  • Eric

    Wow, reading this just helped me out so much, thank you for sharing it.

  • Philip

    dude this article is pretty much the one thing i needed right now.. thanks a million. you really hooked it up.

  • Pat

    I was so close to COMPLETELY getting over ‘that girl’ .. untill she told me to come over to her place .. now all the progress i made just feels like a waste .. i couldn’t NOT go and see her. i missed her too much. i just wish she would stop messing with me..

  • Andrew

    Pat, I know it can be difficult, but you HAVE to take control of this. I’ll refer you to Offspring’s “Self-Esteem” :

    I wrote her off for the tenth time today
    And practiced all the things I would say
    When she came over I lost my nerve
    I took her back and made her dessert
    Now I know I’m being used
    .-= Andrew´s last blog ..How To Have A Kick-Ass Workout Even if You’re Stuck In A Hotel Room With No Equipment Whatsoever =-.

  • Tom

    i dated this girl for 3 months shy of 3 yrs and she broke up with me cus i got mad at her for hangin out with this guy that hit on her and feelin on her at a party a week before hand, she purposely waited till i went to a friends house one night then i called a friend of hers n what do ya know<she at this guys house" n she breaks up with me for being mad at her for going ther after she knew how i felt(week later). now they friends but they aint together n this other kid got a new gf now so im thinking why the fuck did htis even happen?the relationship was kinda rocky towards the end, but this girl just threw away 3 yrs like it aint shit. and she doing things and being with people that we have never done or she has mention in the last 3 yrs of our relationship i mean i know im only 20 and theres alot of fish in the see but damn.and i cant help but think the worst when she comes to mind just bcus she was my world and my life, we didnt spen a day apart (no lie) for the last year of the realtionship. and now shes fine. listen to this article and read other bcus i realize women aint worth this emotional bullshit and drama!!!! thanks for the article man.

  • LJ

    I can sure identify with that! I was so shy back when I met The One. I was nothing like I am now. Anyway, I wound up losing her to another guy and I have been kicking myself ever since. I saw her in every girl I’ve ever been with. Thanks for the article. It is a great one!

  • Tyler

    this really helped my ex and i were dating for about 3 months she was my first for everything kiss,make out,sex and I found out she would be moving to texas b/c her dad didnt want to work here(michigan) anymore so he wanted to move funny thing is she knew when was moving b4 we went out needless to say I broke up w/her and got back w/her in 4 days and ended up going out for almost 3 more months then she left me and said she just used me.

  • john

    listen up to evryone out there…….. i just got my fuckin heart brokin over a girl that i did everything for. me and her always liked eachother when we were in high school and senior year we went out i always loved this girl and finally got her. until today we just brok up and she broke my heart. she said that i couldnt handle the fact that she had guy friedns in college. And yes i di freak out a bout alot of shit and she gave me chance after chane to change and not be a freak out. But i didnt. i ahd thew world in my hands and i kept fucking it all up over nothing. my girl never cheated or did shit wrong. it was me that fucked it all up cuz i was insecure. for all the guys out there dont be insecure let your girl have her freedom as hard as it is let her. If shes a good girl youll never have to worry.. learn from me im alone and depresed everyday cuz i know whayt i had and i lost. i had it all. and now im alone cuz i couldnt handle her havin a guy friend.

  • Mike

    You know this is probly the best article i’ve read on this. I’m 21 now I had this “one” Its been several years us being friends and we’ve fighted alot during the time yet i still thought i loved her. This article actually made me relieze somethings. I think we should be done cause it hurts me all the time txtin, social sites…etc.
    Thanks again!

  • Brooke

    love love love this.

  • Lost

    My first “One” was really just that, straight out of high school – First everything pretty much. She cheated on me once while I was away at boot camp, when we were engaged. I forgave her, we moved on, got married and had a kid together. I told her if it ever happened again she was not getting a second chance. Well it happened again, I booted her out, she has the kids – I have been trying to move on for almost a year now but dont know how. I have slipped a couple times, having sex with her once or twice, have stopped that now. But I still have to talk to her, and having troubles moving on.

    I am lost! — I have been with girls but cant seem to give myself to them, its like I dont have feelings for anything anymore….. suggestion for an ex w/ kids?

    • Andrew

      Hey Lost, I feel your pain. Congrats on having enough respect for yourself to end it. You’re in a difficult situation because, like you said, with the kids in the picture you’re going to have to continue talking with her. i wouldn’t worry too much — trust yourself, you’re stronger than you think you are. Keep at it, and you’ll find the right woman.

  • Baka

    Amazing. I just lost “The One”. We dated for just shy of 3 months and then out of the blue “I dont have feeling for you anymore” and it was over. It has only been a few weeks and we still talk here and there but it kills me. This really helped me figure shit out and I am going to read this when i get down. Thanks for the great article. More on this topic would be awesome!

    • Andrew

      Hi Baka, I’m glad you found it helpful. Don’t worry, things will only get easier. Any specifics in what you’d like to see more of?

  • scott

    This article probably just saved my life.

  • Cherudim

    There was this girl I meet on vacation and I fall hard for her. It was a 15 days vacation, but I get to know her in 13 days. She is amazing. If any of you guys meet her I’m sure you will like her too. I really like her personality. I feel like I can talk to her about anything. I feel comfortable around her and I’m really happy around her. We got along fine; even I told her how I feel about on the last day. The thing is she live really far, in fact we are almost 2 different world a part. The first month was o.k, we talked and we both have fun. After that went I talk to her sometime she doesn’t reply back. At first I though she is really busy with school, and I leave her alone. Then some night I leave her small message, such as have a good night and hope to talk to you soon. In December, everything fall apart. She is someone I never met before and to me, I feel she mean a lot to me. True I don’t know her very well, but I would like to get to know about her more. I think about her all the time, everyday, even she ask me to forget about her. It’s more harder then it’s look. You think I’m stupid??? That I keep liking someone that doesn’t like you back? I know I’m stubborn and I know I say some wrong things at the wrong time. I wish I can take everything back. I don’t regret know her I’m really grateful just to know her.

  • blacksby

    nice job on this..much appreciated.

  • Josh

    Get out of my head.

  • Jon

    She was the one who made me forget my first teenage crush. By then i’s just 13. I felt like she was world to me. I knew where I actually was when she started avoiding me. I had nearly gone into depression. Thanx to the article to show me a light of hope to my new life.MY LIFE.

  • College Kid

    Yep. Met “the one” Sophmore year in high school.. love at first sight everything i pictured to be perfect in a girl look wise she had. She was a year and a half older than me.. Many family problems, but i loved trying to help her with it.. my life seemed so perfect to her, i felt as if she needed me and i needed her. I loved her maturity, it made me grow up fast.. She cheated on me 10 days in… i forgave her telling her w/e it was the begining. Next year, she gets a job. Great. But we fought and ended up breaking up… I find out she let her coworkers do shit to her while i was texting her and calling her and driving around like a maniac looking for her to just say fuck it im sorry… she told me bullshit about how she needed it to know for a fact that i am the one.. ok i forgive you… 3 year anniversary i take her to a concert. We rolled and had the times of our lives… we fight the next week… the weekend later i feel bad and go back to say i am sorry..SHe tells me college changed me and shes afraid.. Keep in mind that i do go out but am faithful and have been these 3 years.. ok w/e we talked on a friday and i said fuck it and went home… next day i go to her house at 3 only to find her gone.. i get a txt saying she went to a college with another guy.. Wow fuck you.. She told me she needs to just chill nothign will happen… fuck it w.e…. a week later she comes to my college to talk.. She says we need to be on a break until she “finds” herself.. Im thinking bullshit in my mind but she threw a lot of good arguments at me.. I broke her finaly into telling me wtf is up… she says she got basically forced into being fingered cuz she was hammered and kept saying stop…. Now i was going to go and beat this kids ass… but.. the fact that this is the 3rd time… just tore me the most… the fact that i really DO need to GROW UP and forget her stuck me like a wall when she told me what had happend.. all those thoughts shooting infront of my eyes.. I cant let her go but i have to.. She still blames me for everything saying i broke her heart… I havent texted her for a good week now… but i still just have this gaping hole in my chest.. and i know i will end up talking to her soon.. the other thing making this hard, is the fact that i got her so close to my family, thats all tehy talk about, is her. asking how she is.. and as much as i want to tell em its over.. i dont want to explain why because well, francly i dont want my rents to think im some dumb shmuck looser who cant ditch a cheating girl… I feel i have it really hard just because of the fact that i gave everything to this girl. I mean everything. Virginity, first kiss, first everything. yes i know it might be wierd.. and i knew, or thought i stuck a ten by the way she made me feel and the fact that well, she was gorgeous and every otehr guy wanted her.. I have to let go. but its tough when (dumb as fuck choice in life presented now) you both planned the college to go to together. She will be here next semester and that will just make my life just a complete shit hole.. Because i just cant even stand to think of the thought of anyone else but me making her smile the way she did. and seeing her date someone else or hook up for 3 1/2 years will def kill me inside even more. im at a complete dot. we already defriended on facebook, but i just cant delete her number… im still so unberably drawn to her, and the thought of giving up someone i trusted, cared for, loved, and made love to, for 3 years just knots my stomach till i puke. I know friends will NOT work. i just cant seem to do it. Even when i try and find another girl, i just point out the bad in her, becasue well the article explains it.. Any help. =/ i know i have A HELL OF A LONG TIME to find THE REAL ONE. I just cant seem to get over her. I feel like a fucking dumbass writing all of this.

  • Andrew

    College Kid, I’m sorry everything’s been such a mess. Sounds like you’ve really done a lot for this girl, and it’s been a long time. There are two steps to overcoming your feelings for The One. First, you have to acknowledge MENTALLY that she’s no good for you and you want to move on. This is usually the easy part, and it sounds like you’re 90% there. Just read your comment again, and then ask yourself, “is this the person that is worth my time? That deserves ME? Is this the person that will make me happy when I’m 80?”

    No of course she isn’t. So punch yourself in the face and tell yourself you’re not going to take this shit anymore. You’re better than this. You deserve more. None of this is your fault, you’re a great guy trying to do the right thing — but unfortunately this girl and you ARE NOT compatible, as evidenced by her cheating on you three times. If you stick around, if you let it happen again, if you let her apologize for one more selfish act, IT IS your fault. The first step, again, is mental. You know you don’t want to be with her. Acknowledge you’re better than this.

    The second step is harder, and what truly takes time. It’s acknowledging in YOUR HEART that she’s no good for your. That’s what it means to be really over somebody — not just knowing they’re not good for your — but knowing in your heart that she’s no good for you, no matter how awesome she is in terms of looks, or sex, or whatever. This is the long part of the process, it could take years. That doesn’t mean you can’t be happy with other women until then, especially if you’re holding to your mental conviction that no matter what, this girl is bad news for you. But every time you go back to her, every time you accept her drunk phone call, every time you rush in to save her from whatever drama she’s going through right now, it pushes you 10 steps backward. You cannot get over her emotionally, until you insist that you will get over her mentally.

    In the end, you know exactly what to do. Stop talking to her and stop interacting with her. You can’t move on if you let her hold on to you. As for your parents, just tell them that the two of you aren’t in the same place right now and it’s healthier for both of you to be separate. Boom, end of discussion. When she comes to college, you will be tested. That’s why it’s so important to start the process now before she gets there. You’ll run into her on the quad, you’ll see her in the dining hall, you’ll see her hanging all over some guy drunk as shit. You need to be prepared for these things. And whatever you do, don’t let her drag you back under after all the progress you’ve made.

    Best of luck, brother. You’re not alone. Every comment on this page equals 10,000 guys in the world who’ve had to get over The One. You CAN do it. Now tell yourself you want to.

  • Serena

    I read this while I am in a mess myself. This happened during my senior year in college…and he and I could not have been more opposite. I saw him looking at me and retorted, “Take a picture, it will last longer!” Our friends were awkwardly…seeing each other…so we were inseparable after that night…and I have so much difficulty in saying it wasn’t absolute, myth defying love like every sappy movie that usually makes me want to vomit. I had to move an hour away from him for graduate school while he worked and he continuously mentioned a fat chick at work that “was obsessed with him” and even sent herself flowers to “get his attention” like someone was interested in her. I never thought much of her being rich or never wearing the same thing…these comments were spread out over time…and we fought more. I was farther away and the distance caused problems. He envied my schedule, as he did not get into graduate school himself and was having to work for a year (where he met her) and was angry with the world. She wanted to pick him up and take him home from work, but I still didn’t think anything of it…he broke up with me to my surprise at the end of the year and I was nothing short of having to go into the looney bin…and he continued to get in touch with me…and I loved him more than life. His ex before me sent me his wedding announcement to that same girl and I found out that they got engaged three months after we broke up…and yet, he woudln’t tell me that and kept getting in touch. His grad school was an expensive one, and money bags would surely cover it. I told him I’d get a lawyer, a restraining order, and ruin his career if he ever got in touch with me again. For many years, that has been so…but not a day passed without him in my mind. The love never diminished. I got married a couple years ago, and recently I decided to make amends with all of the people that had treated me poorly…and he was the one that had broken my spirit…so he was the last one. Before i knew it, he was remembering every detail of our relationship, even things I had forgotten. Two kids and a frumpy but relatively attractive wife and almost all of a doctorate later, he seems to have realized it was a hasty decision…and my heart breaks. Is this attachment? Is this what the article refers to as far as the reference? I understand the situation. I know all the wrong parts of it, I understand the repercussions on every part I have mentioned. This love was by far the most powerful thing I had experienced, however…and he cried the night he broke up with me, which made no sense to me. He continuously got in touch and I found out he constantly kept up with me through the years. He knew things he could only have known by doing research. I just want to know…is this the same as what you are saying, or is this something different? Do people live their whole lives with a hole in the pit of their gut?

    • G

      So what you do is take some dog poop and smell it anytime you think of the one. It will make you realise that you are shi# in his eyes. Nothing more.
      You could try to poop on a pic of him and send it, but he’d probably enjoy it too much, so sent it to me instead and I will not enjoy it. LOL.

  • Shark

    wow, yea, this really hit home. The part that bothers me is how true it is. I took the time out read an article about my situation. we’re ‘bestfriends’. i can’t stand this anymore. I’m done.

  • John

    good work.This reminds me about my old love of school days and I also I understand the situation.

  • Bedros Yanikian

    Great article on how to get over Eliz Baltayan.

  • Scotty

    I met the one in the 6th grade. I started datin her in 7th grade and we just broke up this year. Im a senior in highschool now. We’ve been through everything and i mean literally everything together. I’ve followed all these advice things. and yet she stays in my dreams. what do i do

  • Cody

    Ha great article that I definitely related to for far too long. Have a question. What is your advice if your family hated her for what she did to you and keeps re-iterating? I.e. my sister comments on whenever I date blondes or that I like pwerful women because of the ex, etc. Just tell them to stop because it still bothers me?

    • Andrew


      Absolutely. Let them know you appreciate the concern and thought, but their constant comparison to your ex only jeopardizes future relationships. Tell them they may even be right, but it’s something you’ll have to learn on your own. Good luck!

  • Ryan

    Hey gyys, idk who to talk to. so i looked this article up & i dont know what to think of it. I think that i need to move on from the “one.” but i just cant. right now im a freshman. we dated for 1yr & 5 months. loved her to death, would do anything for her. i was the happiest ive ever been in my life. my family had problems but i was so happy anyway. but one day she messaged me on facebook. she thought we were fighting to much which at that time we got into acouple arguements nothing big. but after she dumped me i was hurting so much. its been 2-3 months after the break up & shes crazy for a guy & happy & carefree like she was with me. i love her so much that im trying to talk to her & trying to make things right. bit after reading some articles & storys idk what to do. if someone would give me so advice i would appreciate it.

    • Andrew

      Ryan, Sometimes the things we want to do least are the most important things we can do for ourselves. If she’s moved on, you’re only torturing yourself by not doing the same. I know how horrible it feels seeing her happy with someone else. I wonder what good talking to her is going to do? She thinks she wants to be with this other guy. Are you going to try to convince her otherwise? And even if you could, should you? Or would you WANT to? This is a hard time, and it won’t go away fast or easy. But you’re strong, and you need to think about what’s best for you. It’s ok to be selfish right now, get yourself past this. Who knows, you guys might come together somewhere down the road.

      • G

        Just make sure you swerve out of her way, she may have found out you gave her a VD and is upset witch U.

  • Pat

    Well i lost “the one” about a month ago, we’re both in high school (shes a senior, im a junior) and I just cant get over her. We dated for about six months and it was the happiest six months ive ever had, we did everything together; we loved each other so much. And then she just started to fade away, i knew it was happening but i didnt want to believe it. One day she just says she cant be in this serious of a relationship with her going off to college and with me having one more year of high school. I understood it but it just absoultly broke my heart, she was so perfect. She is nothing like the other girls in high school, she is so smart and mature and beautiful. And the problem is we still have about a month together left in school and i just cant get over her. Just the thought of me not being the one to make her smile everyday kills me. She said the whole “lets be best friends” thing and i tried, but i know that theres no way i can do that. How do i get over the girl that changed my life so much? I tried throwing away all of the notes and gifts she gave me but i always end up taking them back out of the trash. She knows i still feel this way about her but she just keeps acting as if we are just normal friends and that kills me. Everytime i think of a memory from when we were together i get so depressed because i know it will never happen again. I could really use some advice, thanks.

  • Andy

    I have the same problem as albert, ehy is it so hard to get over this one? And this one only?

  • Caroline

    Pat, that’s exactly what I went through last year with my ex. Even though I’m a girl, this article makes so much more sense to me than anything I’ve read before – or maybe I’m just not blocking it out any more. That guy is long gone, I’m sick of holding on to what I thought we were.
    Great post, and fabulous website 🙂

    • G

      We could try to hook up and make that guy jealous. Consitter it critter therapy. My stick crabs ache for your public lice.

  • Sick one

    I think im the “one” for a lot of girls but my “one” is too busy chasing her “one” who uses her for herr vagina. I havent been with this girl for like 2 years but we talk on and off always. I fell for her sophmore year in high school and im going to college next yearr and it seems like i like her more and more everyday. I can get any girl i want, i hav straight A’s and am all county in two sports so its like i have everything going for me but i feel like killing myself everyday for the last 2 years bc of this dumb bitch. She has a soft spot for me, but always hurts me in the end. I never had sex with her bc she wouldnt let me but ive fucked like 20 girls since her and i end up hating every girl i fuck. It sucks for me but I will eventually learn to deal with it. The thing i hate most is watching how hurt she gets by her “one”. He treats her like such shit and basically ruined her life in high school, her future, and all her friends. Im the only one who gives this beautiful girl the time of day she deserves. I wanna be the one to save her from the hell hole she is in, but i also dont want her to still affect me in college like she did in high school. and should i beat the fuck out this faggot ass kid who hurts her so much? i need some advice because ive never talked about it with anyone in my life and its starting to eat away at me

    • G

      Get a pic of the one and poop on it. Then photograph it and send it to her. She will leave ya alone for a long time guaranteed. Hopefully for your sake, she will return the favor and you will be like, she just duked on me!~ Good luck.

    • G

      BUy a sheep, it’s cheaper and if you cage it up it won’t use it;s vagina to tempt any of your friends!~

  • Torn

    I was 14 when I first met “the one.” It wasn’t until Junior year in HS we started dating. We were together 4.5 months and I was head over heels for her. I tried to kiss her and she dumped me, said she wasn’t ready. Fast forward ten years and im married but I still think about her all the time, even with all the pain she caused me.

    • G

      Oh go buy a barbie doll and get on with it already! What the hell are you waiting for? True love is waiting at the toy store!w

  • Problems

    my girl problem is that i liked a girl…who seemed perfect at the time but now…not so much…i still compare other girls to her…but my main problem is that me and her brother are really good friends. I don’t wanna completely shut him out because of what she did…what should i do in this situation?…Like my sister is really good friends with her so thats an extra bit of problems to add on top of what’s already there. :/

  • ace

    its as if this article was written just for me. i related to this on so many levels its unreal

  • F.R

    Great article!!! I met him in high school.. Broke up after 3 months because i just couldnt see us together in the future.. Its been 10 years.. Im married and we arw still in touch and its messing me up and killing me because we fight all the time and my husband hates him and still all i do is think about him.. Whyy?? I broke up with him. Why am i still not over him!!

  • Kris

    I need help..This article shed some light…I met the “one” at my school when i was a senior, but didn’t talk to her because I didn’t like her at first. Then, the second time i met her was at my job. Literally the first time i saw her at my job was like…WHAT THE HELL…As if there is going to happen between as..As if it was pre destined to happen…After 1 year working at my job..I fell for her..i waited 5 months to tell her because I ignored all of my feelings…When i finally told her..she said that she sees me as a friend, but she started talking to me more and more… It feels like she gave me false hope… finding out that SHE LIKES SOMEONE ELSE but still kept talking to me… EVERYDAY i THINK OF HER talking to the guy she likes and it kills me…So i stop talking to her for a week now..This girl knocked me off my feet..the first girl that did that to me… OH HOW I WISH SOMETIMES I DON’T HAVE ANY FEELINGS… I just wish that i completely know what im doing… I wish that i didn’t trust her and everything.. now when i asked her who she likes..she wont even tell me all she’s telling me is that I know the guy who she likes..WHICH EVEN HURTS ME….. UGHH…. reading this article is uplifting….SORRY IF I WROTE A LOT OF SHIT IN HERE..

    • G

      So here’s the fix. Go to the bathroom, grab a handful of soiled toilet water and gargle with it. Then ask her to kiss you. She will never do it again and will not try to bother you again. The feelings will be alll but gone. Then go home and take a healthy dump. Paste a pic of her face on one of your finest terds… Then play with it for a while and talk to it. After you’ve decided that you played enough with that old shit bag, toss it in the trash and let it stink up your place for another week…. Then when you seriuously get tired of it’s smell, remember that’s what you have been doing to your life poining over her so long. Don;t smell up your life over any one!

  • Mark

    I met a girl my sophomore year of high school. I was drawn to everything about her and everything she did. She had blonde hair a high voice and was extremely attractive and she seemed to be interested in me as well which i was excited about. She always asked me if i was going to prom or homecoming as if hinting that i should ask her, however i could never love myself enough to let myself believe that she would like a guy like me so i would always say no im not going. This continued for two years, until she finally decided to move on and go out with another guy and i constantly find myself asking “what if?” I’m not attracted to anyone else anymore, and i still dream about her. Oh, and whenever i see a girl that is blonde i have to double take to make sure it’s not her. I still remember every conversation i had with her and it is a fond memory until i remember that ill never see her again. I see her everywhere and it has been two years since i have actually talked to her. I related to this article on so many different levels it was uncanny, but i still dont feel as if i am ready to take the steps necessary to move on. I just dont know…

    • G

      Go hire a hooker and boink her. Then give her half her going rate so that her pimp beats the crap out of you for the other half…
      That;s basically what you are doing to yourself with these memories.

      Now go do it and see how it;s not right to cheat a pimp or yourself out of 40 bucks…

  • Dubai guy

    I Am overcoming my ex that I loved Since high school and now I graduated from uni and working only by loving what is more important , the creater Allah(most merciful) and having tighter relationships with family and close friends and now the picture is becoming clear when I told her recently I can’t be friends or anything we should move on like we don’t know eachother and ever since it’s easier don’t ever stay coz it will only hurt u

  • Eddz

    Excellent article; I just wish I found it sooner. It would’ve saved me years of confusion and countless lies to myself.

  • Neal

    Wow… all I’m thinking is… da fuqqq

    True stuff man, good write up!

  • Alejandro

    I never though in this.. when you felt so attached to a woman.. you don´t realice that there´s so plenty o women looking for a opportunity with you

  • Avery

    Hey fellas. I just want you guys to know that not every girl is going to treat you the way “The One” has. My boyfriend just dumped me after our 13-days shy of a year long relationship, and prior to dating we had already been best friends for an entire year. He told me he doesn’t want to have to be in a relationship anymore, that he wasn’t in love with me anymore. He’s not sad about it at all, he moved on a while ago because he mentally broke up with me a while before the actual break up happened. We were talking, he told me he hasn’t been in love with me since around Easter and that he loves me like he loves our friend Brandon. We had sex just last weekend too, and when I asked him why he did that even though he wasn’t in love with me anymore he said “because I’m a teenage boy”. Listen, I know I’m young, but I loved him so much, and I loved him well. I gave him little surprises, and sweet gestures and kind words, I GAVE him my heart, my love, and this is what I get back. It’s so painful to know I’ll be the only one ever losing sleep, or crying, or even being sad about it at all. You think you know someone for two years, then find out you never actually knew them at all. The person you thought they were wasn’t real, and the memories are all you have left. There are girls that will love you unconditionally out there, I was one of them, and now I’m left to pick up the shattered pieces of my heart because some asshole decided he wasn’t in love with me anymore, but continued to use me.

  • Armacon

    Ouch bro…

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  • Maleemporium2014

    Most men can relate to this, I know I struggled with it for far too long.

  • Douglas Aldrich

    Words cannot explain how much this described this past summer for me. Thank you Andrew.

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  • DNA(splicer)

    im in this situation it been a few years and im still literally having dreams about her wtf. She was perfect everything pretty much, i just cant shake her off. Its been at least 5 years but every now and then i think about here or have some vivid dream about her wth its so annoying since after 5 years i still can forget her, It makes me feel like a weirdo, no matter what girl im with i still have these dreams, i think im never going to get over [email protected] days ago i had the most vivid dream about her, what is wrong with me or what did she do to me

  • eric

    So i met this girl recently. It’s my freshman year, and honestly we’re just good friends. It’s just that i always hang around and talk with her. I had a little crush on her. Now sadly shes fucking gone! I don’t think i’ll ever meet a girl like her! Please i need some help. I can’t stop thinking about her. It makes me so fucking depressed! I can’t even focus in school or baseball! It’s like she was that one girl! I did get her instagram, but he phone is messed up. So she doesn’t really get nofications. Then i told her in person to add me on snapchat. I suddenly forgot my username, I told her i’ll meet her and give it to her after 6th period, Sadly didn’t happen. I walked to the bus stop suddenly the bus already left. I still kind of talk to her on instagram. Just wished i could call her on snapchat. She said it was her last week. I told her to atleast say in this school. Now i can’t even spare a second without thinking of her 🙁

  • Alora Fredrick

    Everyone has a life story, I am so happy to have my wife back again after two good years of separation. I never thought we will live a happy life together again, but today, I am so glad for what Prophet Alika did for me as he cast a reconciliation love spell for me to bring back my Ex to live together with me again. My testimony to everyone who is in the same situation as i was, I really want to express my gratitude to Prophet Alika, and also share his contact information to the general public. Contact Email.. [email protected] Contact Phone number: +17252220892

  • jhill666

    Gee , couldn’t you have written this long ago in
    my life , saving me all the stupid shit that I’ve done. Very well written and spot on