Money can make you happy – if you spend it right.
Studies by Nobel prize winner Daniel Kahnemann and happiness researcher Matthew Killingsworth show that…
“In the simplest terms, […] for most people larger incomes are associated with greater happiness.”
But as so often in life, conditions apply.
Spending your money to snort white lines off the dashboard of your new Ferrari or keeping up with the Joneses will only get you stuck on the Hedonic Treadmill – a never-ending quest for more.
True happiness comes from inside yourself.
Instead of chasing fleeting highs, you can use your money to change how you view yourself – and with it, how you experience life.
Hire Fighters To Slay Your Demons
My therapist wasn’t cheap, but I gladly would’ve paid her double.
Before I worked with her, I often assumed I was too much for people and shouldn’t take up their time and space. I thought I only deserved love if I fixed something or someone. I got triggered by small actions, leaving me angry and annoyed for days. She helped me solve the patterns that made me unhappy because they skewed how I viewed myself.
“It is through embracing our pain and looking within that we find the strength to heal and grow.” – Debbie Ford
I know therapy can be this big, scary thing we don’t think we need. But it’s not about needing it. It’s about making a conscious choice to become a happier human being, a better partner, and a more grounded dad.
The payoffs I got were tremendous:
- Reduction in psychological distress. Fewer triggers mean less stuff that upsets you. You’re able to deal with things calmly instead of worrying and lashing out.
- Improved coping skills. You’ll learn healthier coping mechanisms instead of resorting to distractions like Netflix, alcohol, and binging behaviors.
- Better self-understanding and growth. I’ve learned a ton about myself and my patterns. This helped me solve them instead of passing them on to my future children.
- Enhanced relationships and social support. The more you’re at peace with yourself, the more you can be in harmony with the people around you. Your relationships get healthier and you’ll receive more support from your friends.
You don’t have to head to a therapist’s office right away. There are other ways to explore your self-perception. I’ve been to men’s circles, done breathwork sessions, and gone to men-only retreats.
They’ll take you outside of your comfort zone, but that’s where you’ll find growth – and ultimately, happiness.
Support What Gives Your Life Meaning
A man’s most important element is his purpose.
Without it, you feel lost and empty.
I’ve been there. I’ve lost myself in video games, parties, and drugs. In the end, I’ve learned a crucial lesson.
Happiness comes from contribution, not consumption.
You can earn all the money and buy all the fancy stuff you want, but if you don’t find a way to make an impact on this world, you’ll always feel weak, unhappy, and insignificant.
When I was in Thailand, I donated to the local street dog care because I wanted to make a difference in the little fluffballs’ lives.
Maybe you’ve got a local community you can help out. Maybe there’s a big, global issue you’re passionate about. Maybe you want to pass on the life lessons you learned or create a college fund for your kids.
“Ultimately, man should not ask what the meaning of his life is, but rather he must recognize that it is he who is asked.” – Viktor Frankl
If you want to matter, you’ll have to do something that matters to you.
It changes how you view yourself. You’re not a weak, insignificant being anymore. Instead, you’ll leave an imprint, no matter how temporary or small.
Somewhere in the world, someone can have a better life because of your support.
And that’s a damn big reason to wake up with a smile every morning.
Invest In Experiences That Expand Your Comfort Zone
There’s no better way to change your self-perception than to have life-changing experiences.
I’d be a completely different person if I hadn’t traveled for years, lived on three continents, started a business, spent time and money on retreats, and gone on psychedelic trips. Every single one of these improved my perceptions and perspectives – and with it, my happiness.
Unfortunately, most people choose to stay in their comfort zone.
Yes, it can be scary to go backpacking through a country you don’t know, join a Tantra retreat, or live in complete darkness for a week. But that’s just the ego trying to keep you where it’s safe.
If you listen to it, you’ll always have the same insecurities, worries, and beliefs.
Break out of your comfort zone and spend some cash on a life-changing experience.
It’s one of the best investments you can make because it goes directly toward yourself and your happiness.
“Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do.” – Mark Twain
Go out and experience what life has to offer. Change your perception. See yourself through a different lens.
You become what you experience – so feed yourself well.
How To Buy Happiness
The better your perception of yourself and your life, the more happiness juice you create.
Money is just one way to improve it, but if you spend your casholas right, they can be damn effective.
- Face your demons with the support of others – whether this means therapy, men’s circles, or other ways to explore your depths.
- Contribute to something that matters to you – you’ll see yourself as someone who does make a difference.
- Invest in experiences that take you out of your comfort zone – it’s the best way to grow and transform yourself.
If you don’t spend your extra money on what makes you truly happy and with it, others around you – what are you earning it for?
