If you’ve dated in the last 10 years – or you’re dating now – you know the absolute dominance of the apps. If you’re not on them, you may as well be shouting down a well (or that’s how it can feel).
The numbers are staggering: 40 million Americans use dating apps. The share of 18- to 24-year-olds who use online dating tripled from 2013 to today. More people are on the apps than ever before.
Then there’s the bad news: 30+% of those using apps say they’ve never been on a date with a match. And there’s a gender gap – men are about 52% of the users on apps overall.
The dominance – and frustration – of apps has some wondering… have we reached peak online dating? Is there anywhere to go from here?
In the words of Samuel L Jackson, hold on to your butts. Because here’s a story about the unholy union of dating apps and reality TV so insane it might just spell the end of civilization.
The beginning is familiar: Twitter user Миша matched with a girl. She ghosted on him.
The rest … well, just check it out…
I am about to tell you an epic tale about subterfuge, dating in the 21st century and the fall of human civilization. This actually happened to me and it could happen to you too. Get some popcorn. *Thread*
— миша (@bvdhai) August 19, 2018
I message her some random shit and we chat for an hour or so and she says "here's my number text me" I'm like okay sure thing.
— миша (@bvdhai) August 19, 2018
I thought well that's an overly elaborate way to ghost someone. I say "lol I wouldn't be offended, I totally get it. Hit me up when you're free"
— миша (@bvdhai) August 19, 2018
Two weeks pass I completely forget about her then I remember and go back to tinder and I can't find the conversation. 🧐 I think well that's weird she deleted her tinder but I take it as… overly elaborate ghosting methods
— миша (@bvdhai) August 19, 2018
I'm like well I'll be damned. Genuinely didn't think she would message me. I reply "yeah I should be free, I'd be down" she says "amazing I'm gonna be running around today and tomorrow but just come around 6 and I'll meet you by the stage then we'll head out"
— миша (@bvdhai) August 19, 2018
I play football with @mersrulesworld_ earlier today and express my incredulity at the situation. I find her Instagram it says singer, actress, model, 3000 followers and I'm like uugghhhh I dunno bro, THIS SHIT FEELS OFF but fuck it
— миша (@bvdhai) August 19, 2018
She texts me "hey I'm running a little late but just meet me by the stage then we can go" I wasn't gonna stand in front of the fucking stage so I stand off to the side a bit
— миша (@bvdhai) August 19, 2018
I stay back and assess the situation and I'm like fuck I'mma stay right where I am til she texts me. The DJ eventually stops playing and she gets on the stage and I'm so fucking confused but think well I guess she's a social media personality or some shit
— миша (@bvdhai) August 19, 2018
She gets the mic and is like thanks for coming out I bet you're all wondering what this is about and I'm like yeah what the fuck is this about
— миша (@bvdhai) August 19, 2018
Then she says I've invited you all here for a chance to go on a date with me and proceeds to give a hunger games speech about what its gonna take to date her
— миша (@bvdhai) August 19, 2018
Every man in the crowd looks down and mimes WHAT IN THE NAME OF SCOOBY DOO THE IS THIS SHIT to themself
— миша (@bvdhai) August 19, 2018
I went home.
— миша (@bvdhai) August 19, 2018
The scene pic.twitter.com/U0ROAWKDQc
— миша (@bvdhai) August 19, 2018